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.. ??I hadn’t been impregnated, I wasn’t pregnant. Laura never lied, she spoke the truth, but chose her words carefully to make me believe I was, at the time.Was I disappointed... ?? Honestly, no, not really, I’ve said before that sometimes dreams are better than the reality of them becoming real. For me this was such an experience, for the short time I believed it, it was utterly intoxicating, but then my mind turned to the practicalities, pregnancy, childbirth, being a mother, these are life changing events, all would impact our lives, we would have to adjust our routines, how do you keep belly riding from a child? At what age is it appropriate to allow them to see, to learn that mummy likes to be impaled under a stallion?Yes, exactly.So no I wasn’t disappointed. Maybe that is selfish, but I think it is just practical. Laura and I had just married, we should give ourselves time to get used to that, enjoy it, before taking another life changing step.There was one other reason, one. .. I do things to her because I like her. It makes me feel good to do it, because I know she'll like it, not because I have to." Have to?" Yeah, you know what I mean. When it's your brother and he wants to do something, you have to do it because he's your brother. It doesn't matter if you want to or you don't feel like, you do it because he's your brother. And if you don't do it, you'll get into trouble. It's an obligation."After a brief pause, "Do you love her like a lover?"I had to think a moment. "No, I don't think so. When you're in love you only want to do things with the one you love. Others just don't interest you as much, at least that's what I've seen. And there's this girl I met at lunch, Mindy. I think I want to see what it's like to do it with her. So, no," more firmly now, "I'm sure I'm not in love with her like that." I paused, thinking. "I guess it's sort of a combination. She means a lot to me, now, and I want only the best for her, but I don't want her just for.
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